growth.

ahhh... today is a warm day! praise the Lord! I am so tired of this cold weather. it weighs heavy on my attitude and my spirit. I'm definitely a sunny day, warm weathered type of girl, so I am anticipating many more beautiful days like today.


Like I mentioned in the last post, I'm switching over to blogger. Or back to blogger as I should say. I used it before I used wordpress, but this is just so much more user friendly. So, for my loyal blog readers, sorry to keep switching it up on you.

So, if you've been keeping up w/ my last blog (www.malloree.wordpress.com) then you know that I've been doing a Bible study with some women at one of the churches that I attend. It has been tremendously life altering for me. My prayer life has drastically improved and increased, the trust and love I have for the Lord has grown more than I thought it would... more than it ever has, really. We're studying the spiritual disciplines, out of the Spiritual Disciplines Handbook, inspired by the book, "The Celebration of Disciplines," by Richard Foster. Aside from the being stretched throughout the study, I've gotten to be a part of wonderful community with such sweet women. One of my best friends, Carly, (you can check out her and her husband's blog on the right of my page.. they're adorable!) is the facilitator of my small group and some of our other friends, Megan (whose blog is also on the right side), Jennifer, and Christina are also in the study with us. It's been so wonderful and the 5 of us are planning on doing a study together this summer.

Last night, we talked about "relinquishing the false self." I wasn't sure exactly what this meant... but it means to set aside of let go of any place that we identify ourselves away from God.

wow. talk about something I do ALL the time... put on that false self. I often get caught up in what the people closest to me think and how they perceive me or the things I say and do, or if they truly know my heart and believe that it is good. I have always identified myself more with other opinions rather than with the opinion of the Lord. I get angry at times because I want Him to be more audible with me... when He has told me all that I need to know in His word. The only identity that matter is who He says I am to Him. Obviously parts of us are always going to want to be liked and adored by others, and that is perfectly natural, and hopefully fulfilled by those who love you, BUT... if you're like me and thrive off of others positive and encouraging words towards you, then it is time to stop this. It'll only lead to a negative perception of yourself... this I know from experience.

I'm a words of affirmation person... and in the same way that words make me feel loved the most, words also wound me the hardest. It is important and vital to really understand how He loves us, cares for us, adores us, rejoices over us, sees us as worthy and wonderful, as children that He loves... that we are precious to Him, that He fights for us, restores us, heals us, strengthens us, stretches us, teaches us, and is gracious to us. Always.

without giving too much away :) it has been an incredible study for me and has really changed my way of thinking and really shaken me up from dry spell in my relationship with the Lord. it's also changed the way I view people and the way that I love. although I'm hardheaded and my temper and selfishness still get in the way at times ;) I do feel a restoration happening in my heart... making me more aware and more sensitive to the Lord, really hearing from Him, finding my identity in who I am in Him, and how I'm loving others. My goal at the end of this study is not to be perfect at these disciplines, but to look more like Jesus. SO... with 4 more weeks of class, I've still got some serious work to do.

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on another note! school has started back after spring break. I spent my last college spring break training at my new job... which I'm so glad I did because if I had had to do all the training and studying for my work tests along with my school work... I doubt I'd have been able to do it. It was a tiring, but wonderful week. I'm so thankful to have the job that I have and it couldn't have come at a more perfect time.

only a month and a half left and school will be out for the spring. I am taking a may-mester class so I will not get much of a break... but then I only have 12 hours in the fall before I graduate in December. I cannot believe how quickly things are approaching. It's going to be a wild next few months. right now I'm just trying to stay on top of school work, get at least 9 hours of sleep at night (I can't function or be in a good mood with any less), and work... so needless to say, I'm exhausted all the time. I haven't done much with my sorority since my position has been over. That's taken some adjusting.

This week will be a good one... two of my good friends, Jay & Christian, are moving into a new loft after moving out of the 1080 house (which will always hold a special place in my heart). So I am going over to help them paint & then going to see David Ryan Harris for the first time with friends. I am so excited... John Mayer is tomorrow and the rumor mill is that last time he was in town the same time as DRH, he came to the show and played with him. So I'm hoping and praying that happens.

random thought: I need a new book to read. If you have any... please email me malloree@gmail.com and give me some ideas.

hope this finds you well.